Everyone will more than likely have something traumatic happen at least once in their lifetime. Anyone who goes through trauma can benefit from. I know it sounds harsh and I would never want anyone to know the agony of trauma or P.T.S.D. but there is a huge advantage that comes from healing and surviving. When you are at the beginning of recovery it is hard to acknowledge there are any benefits but there is one really big one. You are given a chance to start new and build from the ground up. It is a chance to re-program yourself. Although I would never wish this on anyone, everyone could benefit from this type of resetting at least once in an adult lifetime, unfortunately most of the time it comes from going through trauma and nobody in their right mind would choose to go through it.
When you have a traumatic event happen such as a betrayal in your marriage AKA D-Day your whole world crumbles to the ground and flips upside down. I survived it once and I will survive again. Click to see my story. This time around I have a better appreciation for how I get a chance to rebuild myself. Going through this allows me some time to do some inner work and self-reflection. When everything has been taken away you can start to pick and choose exactly what you want to build with.
When you go through betrayal trauma you question everything you had ever learned throughout your life. You end up second guessing all your previous beliefs and you second guess everything you had thought, felt and learned. We all are aware how we are programmed in early childhood and throughout our young adult life. When you suffer trauma, all of what was programmed into you, is suddenly erased. Poof, gone! Everything you ever thought is now a question, you suddenly have thousands of questions. This is your chance to answer those questions with a more careful, diligent and thoughtful way then you had previously. You have a chance to reprogram yourself and start over from the beginning. It is a huge deal to be given a brand-new foundation on which to build. You get to build yourself how you want and not how you were taught to be. This is your chance to dream and dream big!
The toughest part going through the healing is the grieving for what you used to be, what you thought was going to happen, the loss of a relationship, safety, family, home,etc. Although trauma is a devastating thing to go through, when you do make it through the first couple years after you will find that you are better and happier than you have ever been. If you are careful how you manage the symptoms from the trauma you end up being a person with unimaginable strength and inner peace. It may seem impossible right now but there is some hope at the end of all this. You might even forgive the person who betrayed you or be thankful the trauma happened.
‘Trauma creates change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.”Michelle Rosenthall