EMDR & Home Therapy Exercises Part 5 “Chores”

I have learned a lot over the last 3 ½ years when it comes to what works when I am overwhelmed with triggers and heavy emotions. Some of the worse times for triggers are when I am doing household chores. A good example is when I do the dishes. I go on auto pilot when doing them and that is when the thoughts, triggers and emotions sneak in.  All the everyday chores a Mom must do are the type of chores I would have the hardest time with all the thoughts coming up. At any given moment of any day you could catch me balling my eyes out, frozen from the hurt, paused in time, in the middle of doing a chore.   

A little over a year and half ago during an appointment with my EMDR therapist I learned what to do when I was doing household chores to help process all the triggers I was having.  At the time I was having a hard time at work.  I was having to open boxes upon boxes of wood flooring.  My therapist brought up using a cross body motion to slice the boxes open.  The next day I sliced those boxes open with passion.  After the relief I received from this I started to implement the same thing to all chores I did.  After this second D-DayI am using this same therapy tool again. 

The way to do this exercise is simple.  When you are doing everyday household chores turn them into a chore where you use your body in a left to right rhythm. This is very similar to when Daniel in The Karate Kid does the “Wax on and wax off.” If you are unable to do the whole-body rhythm use your left hand, then switch to your right hand. A good example is when I vacuum, I push the vacuum with my left arm and pull back with my right. When I do dishes, I make sure I am passing the dish from one hand to the other. When cleaning counter tops I do the same thing.   I try to get the largest left to right motion and keep at a good fast paced rhythm. I allow all the triggers to come at me. I don’t try to control my thoughts or emotions. They tend to go as fast as they come when I would normally go on a roller coaster ride with my thoughts. As long as I keep a good pace, the thoughts are getting processed the way my brain can handle it best and in turn keeping myself from suffering anymore physical ailments.

This is a great way to process your thoughts and get them “filed away neatly” in your brain. I have noticed while going through this second recovery round I am having an easier time processing my triggers and find myself naturally doing the exercises and tools I learned from before.  When you practice all the different at home therapy exercises and tools you develop a second nature to processing your triggers that can provide some relief.    

Link to all At Home Therapy Tools

An Empath with no Compassion? Oh yes! You bet!

There have been times in my past and more recently that I have been told to have more compassion.  I guess some feel they have the right since I am a known as a highly intuitive empath, highly sensitive person, I.N.J.F., light worker, energy worker, healer, psychic, or whatever you would like to call it. I guess some would assume I am more compassionate then most people.  Well, I have also been called a witch.  So, there is that. My life experiences have taught me to distinguish between good and bad people.  If you are a serial killer, I have no empathy.  If you destroy families, no empathy.  See how that works.

I have had a recent accusation of not showing empathy. This person is a homewrecker and knowingly slept with a married man.    “You have no idea what I have been through”, is what she wrote.  No matter what you have gone through there is no excuse for you to be a shitty human being, ever. So yes lady, I have no compassion or empathy for you. None.  Even more so since you claim to have been the betrayed partner in the past.  You knew damn well what you were doing.

OTHER WOMAN, HOMEWRECKERS, SKANKS, ETC., LISTEN UP!  It is never okay to reach out to the betrayed spouse.  EVER!  There are a few exceptions to this rule, but it is never okay to initiate first contact. EVER! I am also gong point out the obvious since most of these women are half brained.  IT IS NEVER OKAY TO HAVE RELATIONS OF ANY KIND WITH A MARRIED MAN. IF IT IS OVER, MOVE ON DOWN THE ROAD!  

For all my fellow empaths, never let anybody tell you how you should feel about them.  Your impression is always right!  Trust that intuition!