Let’s talk about the word “Commitment.”

Today I was reading an article about marriage and love/sex addiction on http://www.pschycology.com    Several times throughout the article it mentioned the word commitment.  Stating that both parties in a relationship need to be fully committed and even more important when infidelity is involved.

All our life we hear this word. Commit to school, commit to your job, commit to your paper, etc. We are always asked for our commitment.   Ever since I first found out my Husband cheated, my whole world turned upside down and has never been the same since.  Same with the word commitment being used for marriage. Commitment will never mean the same thing to me, especially after this recent D-Day.

Yeah sure I can give it my commitment.  He can say he is committed but it doesn’t mean diddly shit. I have always gave it my all and I always will. But in all reality commitment is a one-way street. Using the word commitment for a marriage sounds like there is a mutual feeling.  You have no idea if your partner is going to return the commitment even if they say they are.  Of course, you are showing commitment.  You know yourself.  You never know others. I thought I knew my husband through and through.  This is how betrayal hurts so much.  We rely on someone else when we need to be relying on ourselves.

It all comes down to having a commitment to yourself and hope in turn your partner appreciates that, and you appreciate their commitment to themselves. This makes for two happy people in a relationship.

Nobody has your back like you do!

red love heart ornament
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Is your spouse cheating?

Below is a list of signs I should have noticed before I found out my spouse was cheating.  Not all signs signify a cheating spouse.  Please reach out for professional help if you feel your spouse is betraying you.

  • When your spouse has little patience with you (short tempered).
  • Your location is always tracked but when you check theirs, it is off.
  • When they have access to all your accounts, computer and/or phones but you have no access to theirs. When you confront them about some of their social media friends or conversation it makes them very defensive.
  • Your whole relationship they have been over jealous or they are more jealous than usual.
  • When your intuition is telling you something is not right. Example would be you feel uncomfortable going through their vehicle or laundry.
  • They are shaving their hair different “down there”.
  • They are taking extra care of their appearance.
  • They don’t care to say goodnight to you and sleep in a different spot in the house then they normally would have.
  • They always stay up later then you or get up extra early without reason.
  • They spend an extra amount of time on the toilet or in the bathroom with door locked.
  • When they put their phone down it is placed screen down so you are unable to see the screen.
  • They make excuses about their phone not working as a reason why you were unable to get a hold of them.
  • When they say they cannot let you know where they were because it is a secret only their club or job can know.
  • Whenever you start to make friends with someone, they come up with every reason in the book why they weren’t good people and you should not be hanging out with them.
  • You are not allowed to go out with friends.  When you do you get constant text messages and phone calls.  If you were to take a long time to call back or message you get accused of being up to no good.
  • Starts taking phone calls away from you when they never did this before.
  • Checks Voicemails away from you. 
  • You are not allowed to answer their phone.
  • They have developed opinions not normal for them and they will not tell you where they heard them from.

If you would like to add anything to this list, please list them in the comments below. If you are one of the people who failed to see these signs do not fret.  There are millions who feel the same. 

Below is a list of other signs from other social platforms.

From Instagram:

  • Added: 1/15/201

@thenerveofsomepeople Stopped putting pictures of the partner on social media.

@sufficientgrace65 Constantly on computer and phone outside.

@wattsoswares Going back on the pill after they had the snip.

@awe.ful.some Came home from work freshly showered.

@nessmess24 Putting a lock on their phone and saying it was for the kids.

@k.z.dragon New cologne. New clothes and always going to the gym.